Quotes

[jayl0ve]

"I believe I can fly"
- R. Kelly

He really does sound like he believes it, too. The guy's got an ego the size of a room, wouldn't put it past him to truly believe that he's capable of flight if he "Just believes it", that 'There's nothing to it...'

On that note... 'Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream'- George W. Bush

[Mike Rotchtickles]

'Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream'- George W. Bush

yeah, just can't get enough of him.

here's one more,

I've abandoned free market principles to save the free market system. --George W. Bush

[Banthasmaker]

"-Every time you escape, you loose a finger
-If you lose any more fingers you'll be scratching your ass with a wooden spoon."

Bruce Campbell in Alien Apocalypse XD

[Amazing Matheja]

One who sleeps with an itchy *** will wake up with a stincky finger

[Mike Rotchtickles]

Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin.
-- Tim Vine

[Cro Morgan]

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings." - Unknown

[jayl0ve]

This may sound disgusting to you not brought up near the ocean, but peeing in your wetsuit is something that everybody does on days when the water is cold, to warm yourself up. That includes me. That's one time when nobody knows you're peeing on yourself

[VillaJ100]

"If he dies, he dies."

Stefan Edberg.

[coke4]

"If he dies, he dies."

Stefan Edberg.

[Sherlock 117]

This may sound disgusting to you not brought up near the ocean, but peeing in your wetsuit is something that everybody does on days when the water is cold, to warm yourself up. That includes me. That's one time when nobody knows you're peeing on yourself

Do people actually tell you they do this, or do you just assume they do it and you are actually the only one?

[jayl0ve]

No man, trust me Everybody does it.

[emate007]

I immediately piss in/on a wetsuit whenever I see one, it's an ingrained habit. Has caused problems when it's currently being worn by someone else.

[Yippie-Caiay]

lol this made me remember this tyson quote which made me laugh ma off.. “He called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

and the chinese one made me remember this thing a very famous uruguayan comedian used to say "they say there are seven women for every man on Earth...I think there's someone who has the seven that belong to me"

[emate007]

hahaha, yeah I remember that Tyson quote well. Top notch stuff, he's one of the most quotable idiots around.

[jayl0ve]

OH man....somebody's brought up Tyson. I wasn't gonna do it, cuz I'm afraid we could sit here for 5 years posting all of Tyson's insanely awesome quotes.

Here's one of my faves...

"I want to throw down your kid and stomp on his testicles, and then you will know what it is like to experience waking up everyday as me. And only then will you feel my pain.”

The way he delivers that line is so unbelievably hilarious.

There you have it, folks. Waking up as Mike Tyson is exactly the same thing as having your child's testicles brutalized with stomps.